rained @ 6:00 PM

during this period of tough time. i tot it will be tough but god somehow saw my desperation and it's not that tough. i m comforted by HIM and the angels he sent. HE never forsakes me. so how can i forsake HIM. how is it possible to ever leave HIM. it's not possible for anyone. i rmb pastor rony said that the one that u'll never escape is GOD coz no matter what, man has to die and when man die they will face HIM and HIS judgement. so no matter how hard u deny HIM and his presence. it's a choice of urs. and your decision will decide your consequence for eternity.

rained @ 3:50 PM

the day before. my parents found out.i have not told her about it. but i think forget it lah. she's my best friend and i dun wanna put her in a difficult position. it may be a chance that god provided to me through her mother.

I m forced to stop believing in sth i believe in. i m said to be immature. i m not understood. i m seen as a betrayer and a unfilial daughter. i was really hurt. i thank god for placing angels beside me to give me strength and show me the way. i thank HIM for enlightening the decision i should take. edwin, gor, da jie, helen.. i know the path ahead is not going to be easy. pls pray for me my fellow brothers and sisters, children of christ.. i cried alot past few days. after talking to edwin, i was really comforted. he told me it is okie. he prayed for me.

i wanted to stop crying and stop myself in self wallowing. i prayed to god to let me control my emotion and not let it control me. devils can control my feelings easily. mysteriously, i stop crying immediately. and after that. no tears flow out again. and the path ahead seems clearer. my god knows all my needs. and when i came home they never spoke about it anymore. that morning mum was still scolding me as useless daughter.

very much they wanna control my life and thinking they know everything. it's not the case. i know what they dunno and it's difficult to make them see it. i know i m wrong i should have told them about it myself and not let them hear from someone's mouth. i wanted to tell them when i m prepared. but maybe god saw i will never have the courage and provided me the opportunity through someone. it's sth i have to face sooner or later.

now what i am doing may be against my will. but god asked us to obey our parents. and it's a sacrifice i will do to fulfil god's word. and to prove to them i am able to lead a good life and be a better person coz god made me so. i hope i will touch them someday till they know about my great god?

everytime i sing "how great is my god.." i will really feel so touched. indescribable feeling. there's a few person i need to pray for. i pray for my brother to lead a balance christian life. i pray for mummy daddy and er jie to recieve salvation. i pray for all my friends to know about God. i pray for them all...

rained @ 6:08 PM

yest had cell group meeting! ate yu pian bee hoon and caught up abit with my tickling partner=))) sportified! we're pink elephants! super funny! had fun with them!hahaha!

going for intership soon!! excited cant wait! bet it will be fun! and yes i still miss obs! visit me at conrad=) byeeeeeeeee!

rained @ 11:26 AM

my bites are really itching! i need to scratch claire or evadne! hahahaha! and my throat hurts. today went new believers class. so scared i late again lah. yup. bought things to bun my hair for attachment next week! came home and then er jie and gundy bought me a cool watch and bro nano i pod. hahaha! er jie keep self praising her good taste. i have no habit to wear watch but shall wear more often=)

yea, just completed alot of orientation stuff! i have effective maymay!=) gonna miss my JC best friend lah! i'm gone for 5 days now she's gonna be gone for #$@!% days! yea, still in the obs- kindda mood! miss obs and dawnnnie! hahaha!

oh yea! my room is painted!! blue and purple! cool eh! 2 walls blue 2 walls pink. hahaha! i miss my obs lah. but like at least i m more hardworking with household chores after coming back from obs!=) that's good! yea, tml cell group meeting and sportified with yulin=))))

rained @ 12:49 AM

OBS!!

DAY 1
assembled in sch then went to ubin. split into groups! CHENG HO!! bibi is our instructor! we played ice breaking games and then took photo. managed the store. when had to wait for replacement of equipments. ppl were like entertaining themselves and it's really funny! then went for thrust fall. was really scary but fun! yea, then went to belay. hahaha! and it's like CHENG HO is really funny. stanley and thomas made the belaying call sound so funny. hahaha

(serious face) seriously, belayer am i on belay?
(DUH FACE) no, u're not
(pause)
(excited face) that's me!

HAHAHAA! laughed this joke throughout the whole camp and never got sick of it. another one is

BIBI CHECK!

and also

OMG!
LOL!
ROFL!

and also

SELF OWN!!!!

HAHA! super lame. not even funny but we kept laughing about it for 5 days. yea, aft belaying, went to pitch tent and camp cook. CHENG HO is really fast and efficient. like diff from my 1st obs. everyone takes initiative to do stuff and it's really good. =) our food was really nice thnx to our food i/c kaiyi and lihao! like home cook food. we were told we had to manage our own thrash for the days at expedition. so we learnt thrash management. at night, we had 1st aid briefing then went to pack our bags for expedition for next 3 days.

DAY 2
woke up in morning. had morning games with buddy watch batutta! =) caterpillar game! I WANNA MINGLE game and the colour game. had morning circle. we had to evaluate the past day performance and mornign blessing=) then had rock climbing=) everyone stepped out from their comfort zone and everyone climbed up once at least. then aft that we continued to pack our bag then set off for our expedition. learnt kayaking. then like kaiyi and stanley quarreled. and had to see the obs instructor. but then at least all worked out and they were able to know each other better. yea, we kayaked and then pitch tent at this part of ubin. then had to find rocks to build tent. that night was really tired. slept like a rock. talked to yewseng thomas and stanley abt ghose stiry. dint knwo what they talking about coz was too tired. yew seng's serious face is really FUNNY LAH! had to do sentry duty. hahaa! dawn told me they woke me up but i couldnt then when she said got illegal immigrant i ran out of tent-___- hahaha! OH YEA! zhuang shu, xin pei and dawn are tent mates! really love dawn! she's so cute and her smile can make your day. really! my laughing partner! =D

day 3
packed bag load our bags pulled out kayak and off for sea EXPEDITION!! i partnered lihao and we row row row! hahaha! was fun lah! then like we rowed pass chek jawa and alot of places. 3/4 around pulau ubin. kayak for around 8 hours. half way we were caught in a storm! and it's really kindda scary like REAL SEA EXPEDITION! when we were near shore. right side got pillar left side got rock then like the rain keep pouring and kayak kept drifting then had to keep rowing to stay in middle, was really kindda scary. but we all got up safe. firdaus scrapped his hand on the rock though. was quite a bad cut. then agnes was really tired coz she rowed single kayak for long hours. then rain stopped and rain stopped and rain for 3 times. was quite high coz like we managed to got up safe. then when it finally cleared. we set off last stretch of our sea ex! we reached our destination! and was like so happy lah! loaded kayak and bags on shore! we were really early! thnx our sea ex leader and everyone=) did CHENG HO CHEERRR!! hahaa!

YO!
BIBI CHECK!
bibi: CHECK
WOWOWOWO
CHENG HO WOOSH!!! =)

invented by dawn and i!

so we had time to pitch tent cook and go for quarry dip!! had really great fun at quarry dip. dived in!! everyone spiited water on each other face then we kapt laughing at the belayer and omg and bibi check joke! =) really really fun coz we haven bath for like 1 day plus le. so was really comfortable. my 1st time too. hahaha! then bibi was telling us ghost story of the quarry. ghost comes at night to pull u down quarry. nth will happen in day light coz the birds around it will peck their hands. but then aft 7 if we still there will be pulled down by them. yea, then really enjoyed each other's company. wont have chance to go back there with the same group of ppl already. and i know that. so really treasured the time. went back to cook food. then that night had orienteering talk and then at night had sisterhood talk! tent mates and stanley.hahaha. i was really tired lah. then hear armstrong play truth or turth till i fall asleep. next morn they told me i said self own in the middle of the night. hahaha really funny. coz i dint know i will sleep talk.

day 4
had land expedition! our bags are really really super super heavy can can? 3 days of personal stuff and group stuff. had morn games with battuta! new version of i wanna mingle game and tree,hunter,earthquake. morning circle! morning blessing! yup so we set off for land ex! thomas and i were navigator first. then like got 8 checkpoints. 3 compulsory. we manged to fine horn bill, 16rubber seeds and 6 diff fruit trees so we minus 3 checkpoints. yup. 1st checkpoint had blind man build tent. then aft reaching 3rd checkpoint. pass on to firdaus and arzfar to navigate. then aft that went to peak of ubin! was really pretty, never gone there before. hahaha! we were supppose to look for quote. then when we went to the peak. there was no quote. so bibi told us it may not be at the peak. we found it on the way down.

it says: the more one gets to the "top" , the more one realizes there is no "top". hahaha! and i dun understand coz i told her it means the cluee is not at the top and dawn kept laughing at me. another one was "one never knows his strength till he is in hot soup." so i said go on everyone. we will know our strength coz we're all in hot soup now. and dawn kept laughing again.. but the land ex was really really tiring. i felt my leg was giving way. thanks god for giving me the strength to move on. and providing me such good company. stanley and thomas entertaining us with horrendous singings. and like we help each other carry stuff lah when everything was heavy. and encouragement keeps one going. i learnt that and i applied throughout the whole land ex! last stretch back to campsite 2 led by xin pei and xhuang shu. got hornet attack so we had to go a long way. was really really tiring lah! after travelling 20km we reached camp 2! the last stretch up and seeing the sunllight was like AHHHH!!! so happy. when we reach the rock climbing place. everyone went kukku lah! so so happy! then like we massaged for each other then like lay down on the floor! IT FELT LIKE KING KOIL!!! it really really did. the happiness of putting down bag lying down strecthing our leg was indescribable! we did CHENG HO CHEER!! wooooo! hahaha was so happy.

then like aft that had to pitch tent and cook food and bath and unpack. so like everything was in relax mode lah. coz like finally got back camp 2. that night bath super long and was super shiok!!! and then like the food was super nice. coz we were in relax mode. we were late for 4o min in meeting bibi. she was really like quite sad and dissappointing lah coz like we had been performing really well for the past few days=( sorry bibi. then aft that like we cleared remanining of store and slept. wanted to talk that night but then they dun allow. so like we tou tou talk lah. suddenly they go siam siam siam and everyone siam and act sleeping. then when instructors gone we talk again. thomas came to our tent to talk. yea, then i fell asleep halfway. oh ya in ubin u can aways hear this prayer voice coming from another island or jungle de in the night and it's really kindda loud. yes so next morn dawnnie told me sth scary happened night before lah.

dAY 5
cleared our store and that took up almost whole morning. we lost nth! so was goood lah. bibi found replacement for the broken stick. then went to buy souvenir. sell so little stuff can? hahaha! then had reflections for past 4 days. i kept crying non stop lah. then when it's my time to share i dunno wad rubbish i was uttering lah. hahaha mind black out seriously. really sad to leave.

*i wanted to say my whole obs had no low time coz everytime was high coz of u guys.
*i wanted to say land ex probably left deepest impression on me coz it really let me realized my strength coz i was really drained out and the power of words of encouragement. i dint know my words of encouragement had such grest impact on them all.
*i wanted to say the take back from this obs is that we can help to lighten each other's load by encouraging and that i can do anything i wanna do as long as i set my heart on it! i complete 20km with that heavy load, i can do ANYTHING! power of mind!
*i wanted to say that my biggest take back from the camp is still the memory they gave me and the great friends i made and the GREAT GREAT experience i had with 16 of them!!


dawn.xinpei.zhuangshu.stanley.thomas.yewseng.kaiyi.lihao.firdaus.arzfar.agnes.jasmine.fardilah.hudah.waifang.BIBI!!

thanks bibi for being such a world class instructor. she really is like our friend=) love you girl! i really love the teachings of obs leh! i wont mind working there for part of my life. and i really love morning blessing coz god really made our morining blessings come true=) my obs experience with CHENG HO 13--17 nov 2006 really really rockssss!!

now i am adapting back to civilisation. i dun wanna become complacent again! must continue to treasure all that i have! went to had kfc and watch step up with CHENG HO after that! really funny to lup the heavy bags around. HAHA! and we blocked ppl's path way in the cinema lah=) coke and bed and hot clean water and home cook food really is a luxury aft coming back from obs! thank god for letting me experiencing it all all over again! it really enriched 5 days of my holiday!

rained @ 10:32 AM

today had highlights meeting. then went shopping with chormin and may! we each bought 2 items! chormin bought skirt and belt, may bought shirt and sunglass. i bought shirt and necklace! had fun eating venezia ice cream too=) yea! last meeting with my JC best friend. till 2nd dec!

came back watch meet the parents and then pack obs bag. just finish packing! pack for 2 and a half hour lah! i m so tired now! not bringing my handphone to obs! bye to civilisation for 5 days! DUN MISS ME! TATA!

rained @ 12:07 AM

hey! today morn went TCC phototaking! nabil smile super funny! then exco meeting! =) haha! started with the nus ppl. quite fun lah. then had a great exco meeting too! then games comm meeting. waited for may. talked to gp abit abt christianity=) so glad u are at least kindda receptive about it!

accompanied MAY to tajong katong shopping centre at katong. the one we are looking for is tanjong katong complex at paya labar! so we spent hours on bus travelling then got really wet! through all storm man! haha. yup then was late for new believers' class. guilty lah. so i was really early for service!

the service today was really really GREAT! i learnt so much and i saw 2 ppl demon possess. can hear from their shouts that the pain was excruciating. kindda scary but in complete love there's no fear! halfway through song the man was in pain. i prayed for him and when i open my eyes i see ppl around doing the same and speaking in tongues. the true spirit of fellowship! and i felt god strongly today! the teaching was good. my lord jesus christ grew up like any normal kid. but he knew he was child of god and had to go through crucification. yet he went through it knowing the pain but also knowing he would save us all=) how could i do without HIM? and then the testimony today. the woman really went through a lot and backslided alot. but god never left her=) praise the lord! lord showed her the way, healed her and changed her=) When the woman was undergoing depression and panic attack, devil spoke to her that life is meaningless and should end her life. she heard it in an audible voice. evil satan! our lord will bless us all! she felt god's personal touch too. then end of service. everyone knelt down and praise the lord! i felt him real!! today. a gospel lighter prayed for me too=) i would be aquire with the right things to say at the right time to touch ppl around me!

love my lord! give me the strength to pull through all. cant wait to say the truth and tell my family about my lord!

ADDED PICS TO MY SENTOSA POST! HOHOH! SUPER HIGH!=)

rained @ 12:17 AM

today spent with council is funfunfun! haha. met at parkway then settle lunch at foodcourt. went for crazy cup at ngee ann pri aft that. helped to set up and then briefed on the rules! me and may partner! =) had fun judging them! some were really sporty!=) and the kids are really pro! i'm very lousy in fact compared to them! hhaha.. one kid did 10.68 secs lah! was quite messy initially but got better aft that! hahhaa. when it was finals, was quite boring. but had fun playing with may! hahaha! and *secret* happened.

yea, then aft that PAY! $30. we went to parkway swensens for dinner! it was a great dinner. the blue coral sth lah. baked rice and soup and ice cream! yummy! then we went settlers to play for an hour! met derrick and siwei working there! hahaha!

played with STEPH BENG BONGBONG! and it was fun! we played family business. super fun game! sabo allies and protect and kill each other. hahahaa! super funny! they started attacking yonglong and so i joined in then aft that me and steph allied. then beng tried to ally with yonglong but yonglong just keep killing liat beng coz liat beng killed him just now. so they were like killing each other though both of them dying soon le lah. super funny. hahaha! so steph and i conquer=))) hahaha!

then we played the jungle speed game! hahaha the shapes are so similar and so difficult to differentiate lah! think must use dydx! hahaha! yea! then had fun too!=) so had fun at settlers though it's only like an hour of game! cheers to 30th council! love you guys!

lord i hope that everything i pray and wish for will come true... bless my friends and family=)

rained @ 11:43 PM

today is such a FUN day spent with 1406! love my class=) we met at harbour front mrt. suppose to meet at 11. but everyone is late. AS USUAL and then they only started eating lunch at 1230. hahhaa! helped momo put her contacts. really like force it in one lah. haha! went vivo city the chicken rice shop. went candy empire with bekah and she told me about her Funny tipsy story. bought bread to sentosa too!

vivo top level open space is really nice! but it started raining. kindda sad lah. but then the rain is like on off on off kindda rain. we took shuttle bus to sentosa! cam whore super loads. then got steam on the floor de! like dry ice effect. super cool! went siloso beach. we were kindda high! shouting HI to passer bys!

yea then we walked along the beach. leg super pain. hahaa! tried following alvin's footstep coz less pain. yea. then we went down to sea to play. hahhaa! played monkey. damn high! i m MISS MERMAID! hahaha! then we dunk each other! and gordon did his stupid shark thing. which is acty his floating pocket! super silly. then started raining or sth. we had to clear off the sea

hahaha! when we went on shore was so cold then alvin held an umbrella and then everyone hide behind him! super funny! like umbrella alvin! 10 ppl cuddling behind HIM! whahahaa! like lao ying zhuo xiao ji! whahaha! then we took pic of it. super funny.

made our way to the sapphire pavillion. then we cleaned ourselves with the rain water then played captain's ball! wAS FUN! then cam whore even more! hahahhaa! then rain stop! they went to play volley ball. i stayed there and eat with momo and cm. haha! super greedy! then went to join them play volley!

hahaa! super high again. made a rule! whenever we say i love candy must dance at the *TETETETETE* part. so like I LOVE CANDY! *TETETETETE*(shaking!) yea, so we played then become play soccer! i m rather lousy at soccer! cant control the ball one loh. hahaha! so jx and bekah dun acknowledge me as teammate! whahahaa!

mingwei and ron came aft that! then we cam whore ALOT! coz it started raining again! BTH us! but was really really fun and funny! like i was stonging coz too tired. but can still cam whore when we stoning! hahaha.

then we played zhong ji mi ma! then truth or dare. hahaa. quite fun lah! mingwei suppose to do the I LOVE CANDY THING! and when he shake. it is super funny. took a pic of it. hahhahaa!

then aft that they dunk me into the sea and i dunk all of them too! MISS TAN IS STRONG! hahhaa! almost lost my specs. they found it for me! we failed to dunk mingwei! hahaa! then we went to bath! and went out of sentosa for dinner!

more cam whore along the way....

then yup ate super loads! so HUNGRY CAN? ba cou mee, kway tiao, chendol! hahaha! then went home! on the way heard ming wei's story and talked about christianity..

i love my god! for my friends and my life and for always being there through EVERYTHING! how can i live without my god! =)

1406 we rock big time! hahaa our most successful turnout! more next time!=) coz things are always fun with these buncha ppl!!

PICTURES!









end off with my pretty pic! TATA~

rained @ 9:47 PM

today went sch for op! it's FINALLY OVER!=) yea! hahaha! we made some changes to survey result. so when i saw them holding a cpoy of our wr. i was so scared and shocked lah! but then over!=)

bekah hx cm and ping shared present! pony black bag and earring! hahhaa! i love them! thnx darlings! if u want ur friend to buy u a bag for ur present, bring an ugly bag to sch! esp lime green one! hahaha! i LEARNT=) and bekah's card! sweet girl!

went to eat lunch with 1406 at parkway swensens! 11 ppl! more on the 9th okie?=) yea, love our class! they surprised me with a bday cake! hahaha! really surprised! no wonder they keep going toilet! hahaha! then aft that met tickling partner at parkway! she invites me to SOSO! hahaha!

went back sch for crazy cup then slack in council room! hahaa! dunno doing what! then may and i went to eat opp sch and at bedok central. hahaha! spending every money we have with us and exploring new places tt i've not been before! but it was fun nonetheless! talked about our past! wahhaa!=) love my JC BEST FRIEND!

new believers' class start this sat!=) cant wait! love my lord!

rained @ 9:41 PM

today my bday! at 12am lotsa wishes and calls from friends.

1st thing in morn! may xhui and siying suddenly appeared at my house and shock me! thank you girls! hahaha really love the cake the card the present from flacee and sexy and of coz the effort love and time!

then went sch! then momo surprise kiss me! hahaa did op! and thnx for all the wishes friends!!

next went to meet butties! haha they blindfolded me to the place and surprise me with the decors and fooD! hahaa! love you all butties lotsa effort into it!=) we talked and then took pictures!

and then went ping's house before we leave for our cycling adventure! hahaa! cycle till my butt and hand super pain lah! there was stalker nice ppl and we got check it out lotsa times! HAHA! super rubbish! love u girl!

then aft that met evad and karen and we ate super loads can? hahaha! chicken sushi and $8 venezia ice cream and then fish and co. eat until stomach pain lah. but really enjoy presence of this 2 silly girl! refuse to say mamamia with me! hahaha! yea then they gave ma a surprise! said wanna collect sth form friend. brought me to the beach then along the way act as if friend call then like mother call. hahaa. but i know sth was on lah. but the calls were real. i fell for that! but then i was really touch to see karen putting the sparklers and sweating so much! love the 2 of you! thanks for ending my bday on such high note! they wanted to wish me online yest too! sorry spoilt the surprise by going off line!

tricked claire when she called me and thnx jx for the e card. and carmen karen and evad for blog!

cut cake with family when i came back. hope my wish come true coz it's really impt to me!

and i wanna thank all those who wish me and hug me and tot of me! really thankyou I LOVE ALL MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY. LORD PLEASE BLESS ALL OF THEM...

and i had my most happy bday with lotsa surprise and the biggest gift from lord and my bro!


karen and evad wated to show me this online











evadne made this for me!














From carmen:




HAPPY BIRTHDAY TICKLING FRIEND
to my sweet lady tickling partner olvl-fellowteacherbugger happy sweet 17th and ill be your friend till the end the godmother of your cross-eyed pretty kid until we're old and haggard we'll sit among the church congregation and tickle each others hands. I LOVE YOU!



and claire:
HAPPY SEVENTEENTH TAN YINGXIU!
you've been one of the craziest, loudest, tallest, silliest, senseless, crankiest, wackiest friend ive ever had! thanks for all the love you've given me(:
have plenty plenty of fun tmr! i LOVE you sweetheart(:
you're gonna enjoy your birthday tmr i PROMISE! :D

rained @ 11:01 PM

The concert was great! musics that worship GOD and all! i just love it! enjoying his presence and it just touches me to see people go down to receive christ every session. just now there was a lot of them. praise my GOD!

amazing love
how can it be
that you my King would die for me...

rained @ 6:12 PM

yest was a great great day! =) i brought beng to my church. i hoped it helped him in learning more about jesus. i believe it takes time for you to accept Him..

i went back home. and i told my brother i wanted to talk to him. i felt it was the best time to talk because i just came back from church and the spirit of father is still fresh in me. so we talked alot. i told him about my experience and i told him why i took so long to approach him. there was a long silence but i'm just so glad we manage to thrash things out.. after that mummy and daddy came back and we had to stop our conversation. when mum and dad went to sleep again. he sneaked up to my room and we continued to talk till 1am plus.. and he taught me a lot. i realized my brother really loves god ALOT. and my love for god is much less stronger than his.

gor gave me my bday present! TIGGER i love it and treasure it. and he also wrote me a note. i'm so glad i'm able to share the rest of the spiritual journey with him. i should have told him earlier. i should not have held back. he wrote me a note. and he told me to worship god in spirit. he say i m rather weak in soul coz i am very emo and keep crying. he says satan will attack our soul so we must be strong in spirit. that is sth i must train my self to do.

also, about the salvaged thing. gor taught me. and now i know. who am i to question GOD. i should thank HIM for i m salvaged. he told me to save others but not neccessary they will be saved. like how he told the guy to push the rock. he dint tell him the rock will move. so i must place my faith in GOD and my love for HIM will grow stronger everyday.

thanks god for giving me the courage. pls supply me with more to touch my family and friends around me. i love you my LORD! off to meet carmen and the cell group for concert!

my life is so promising and fulfiling and filled with purpose now that i have GOD in it!

rained @ 12:00 PM

i love my god. he's been giving me the courage and power to influence people around me. and manifest HIS greatness! i really love you my god. i'll be praying for all my friends and family to know about HIM. your life is going to change i promise you when u receive GOD into your life!=)

rained @ 2:02 PM

today! met up with butties! before that had a long wait at the beach for around an hour. but i was not lonely coz the beach god created is simply too pretty!

yea! haven gone to the beach in a long while so was feeling very good! we had dinner at the lagoon! and haha! we're pigs. we ate western food, satay, chicken wings, hokkien mee, wanton mee, satay beehoon, desert and drinks! 3 of us and so much food! we talked quite alot and catch up on each other's life =)

then played sparkles at the beach. threw the sparkles like shooting stars and made 3 wishes. hope my wishes come true coz they are really impt to me. yea so it was tiring coz we took pic with every sparkle we lit and when it's almost dying out we run to the beach throw and make wishes. hahaha!

then we sat and talked about our old old days in guides. suddenly felt we really share alot of memories in guides. the camps holds lotsa memories for 3 of us. and some were really really funny. cant stop laughing. farting story, saliva story! hahaha! =)

you two are like the friends i have most quarrels with but because you two are so close and impt to me. cant imagine wad it will be like without u 2 in my life=) love you girls!

rained @ 1:57 AM

i just read the firm foundation book : Hearing from god. and it answered my question. it happened yestday too when i randomly flipped to a page in daily bread. it says Doing What We Can. we only can plant the seed. we cant do everything. we have to leave it to god to do the rest. to touch the lives of the people we pray for.

and there are several ways to hear from god. one way is to Hear from god. when i acty know that people do HEAR from jesus. through audible voice like a man talking to him. and u read about testimonials about it. u have to believe that god exists. god talked to the man and told him his friend was in trouble and he talked to his friends about it. the friend was convinced god exists. and god talked to pastor rony saying "son, i'll use you to shake nations" and that's why he's a pastor now influencing life of many. but must it happen to everyone before they will start believing in god?

also, i went to church and i felt scared yet awed when people start speaking tongues. it's like a language noone knows. at least i do not understand what they talking about. like some language we hear elves speak in TV shows. i asked them how they know how to speak. they said it's a gift from god. you have to pray for it. and it's really amazing to know people pray for that gift and they acty KNOW HOW to speak it like that. when they pray in tongues, it's like WOW. a standardized language that is a gift when u pray for it. how more real can god be? emerald told me when they speak tongues they do not acty know what they are talking about too. it's like when they speak tongues, it's acty the holy spirit praying through them. how amazing is my god. how real is my god.

however much u feel that ur life is happy now because there's no stress, rs prob or whatever, nothing beats the happiness and gratefulness when u know about God. knowing why u appear on earth, what's ur life on earth for and knowing where u will go after life on earth. and the gratefulness and easeness to know the truth which was blinded in the past. sometimes i would think back and i would be so filled with emotions. because I know the truth NOW. and i felt how silly i was in the past not to realize and rejecting all the offers to go church and to know more about god. but now i know i m saved. i feel sad coz so many people still do not realize. i see my past in them..

just read peizhi's blog. god also touched my life like in her case. i was lucky to get the hotel attachment and it falls on the week btw my obs and council chalet. no clash at all. how great is my god. And i can acty understand why we must get a bf who's a believer. coz it's like i know my life has changed now that i know the presence of god. it's like i know when i die i would see my father god in heaven and spend eternal life with Him. so sure. never felt anything that can be even more ensuring than that. and getting a bf who's not a believer is like we're totally moving in diff directions.. that day when i watch the video at city harvest. the couples are so blessed coz they know their love is going to last for eternity..

rained @ 1:40 AM

today went back sch for ogl interview, slacked at sc room for half the day and then went out with cm and hx aft that. hahaa! i wanna go thailand! hope i can go! will be fun going with phorn and the guys=))

rained @ 10:57 PM