no more papers! chem was really shitty today! after the paper i got so worried for my prelims and A levels. coz my studying pace is slow i understand slow and my concept is not good! =( nvm! xiu xiu u can do it in god's strength! and thank god i'm grateful to have all my friends in 1406 for they are there when i needed them.

life has been so occupied with so many things i spend so much time worrying about worldly stuff. i dun like it. i dun mind going thru it but i must rmb i'm living in god's earth and all i'm going thru is god's plan and stop trying to do it so much in my own strength but look to god for direction and support. i think da jie is also planning the wedding too much by her own strength too. when that happens, we tend to wanna get things done and lose focus on what's more impt. love and care for ppl around us and all that we do.. and rmb to keep smiling and be happy that god allowed us to go thru it no matter how shitty the situation is. anw, it's god we're serving. god god god! please come and take over my life! i know i am weak and i am nothing without you! claire, can we start some bible studies? i need to hear god's words more frequently than what i'm doing now. i need to fellowship more! now i know how it's like to lose that connection with a church. i'll start to sink into the worldly tempo when all i want to do in my lifetime is to do meaningful stuff for god.

wedding is this sat. went to julia again just now. tried gowns then took qj's shoes and the car ribons. tml buying shoes with er jie. the one i saw with cm and hx today=) it's really really arriving. the week pass really fast... gor gor it seems like a long time since i last saw him. so many ppl i miss and i wanna meet again!

god, i'll study hard and i know u'll put me where i'll be best to fulfil ur plans. i know i just have to do my best in all the task i'm given. the rest it's up to you. really. i should just stop worrying so much. all your plans for me will fall into place. i'll treasure the coming few months where i'll do my best preparing for A levels. then the rest i'll leave it to you. then after As. lord then i'll spend my 8 months wisely doing all the things that i so ever wanted to do but no time to do. meet all my friends, spend more time with my family, volunteer, i really wanna go church i'll see how ur plan goes, work? check up all the scholarships and firms that i'm interested in. yes yes yes lorddddd! i need more of you in my life!

rained @ 10:23 PM

1) i think your best friend are eating lion meat now. so they dun have anymore best friend coz u're being eaten.
2)i'm sitting beside an evil witch who is gg to cook me for dinner. but ur prince came to save me. I stole ur prince. too bad.
3) xiao ding dang came and play scissors paper stone with me and he keep losing. I wonder why. omg! i saw ur slippers. it's with superman.
4) just now my hand got rolled over and became flat so i always win coz i use paper to win stone. The slipper is called super slipper now coz it's with superman.
5) superman told badman's identity and turned into bad spiderman. He was so bad then he came into the library and stole my slippers.
6) fairy godmother turned into a pumpkin. the mrt is cinderella's carriage. the prince threw ur slippers away.

these are the msgs huixian have been sending me the past few days! i think my friend is too stress. everyone buy her choc to console her okie? she wants to be part of fairy tales=) hahaha!

2 papers down today. i know i dint well. but oh well! just do my best lah! and study hard for prelims. saturday is wedding day! excited and kindda nervous too. my sis going to be another man's wife! boo hoo! bekah damn horny. hahaha!

after thursday chem paper! i need to buy earrings, heels, and then decorate house, prepare emcee speech, tidy my room and last chat with my sis! and get ready for the wedding!!!

then all of us can wear our different dresses and suits that we've bought during the holidays! i think my family spent like near $2000 on all the shirts and stuff. hahaa! plus the renovation of house. wow alot of money pumped into the economy! multiplier effect then increase national income and increase investment! oh no! but will have crowding out effect!hahaha:)

ohhhhh! so fun so fun! it'll soon be over and i'm gonna miss my sis REAL BAD!

kaes, i better go study now! BYE BYEE! i miss the kidddds!

rained @ 6:59 PM

rained @ 5:29 PM

yest we had family lunch at tong le! it's suppose to celebrate mummy daddy's belated 28th wedding anniversary coz we dint get to do it last sun. and we ordered so much food coz last order was 2pm and we only arrived at 115pm. then qianjun was supposed to fetch mummy then his car died. luckily in the carpark and he and mummy had to cab down. hahaha! we really ordered ALOT! like pigs! had like much leftovers and sis said got penalise for food wastage. and we ate so much that all of us skipped dinner coz we were all still so full from lunch! we were so shocked when 20 gluttonous balls filled with sesame arrived at our tables. and we kept shrinking responsibility from the food by accusing each other of ordering.

gor said that time they were in beijing it was worse. coz they tot that it's only polite to finish all the food so they kept eating! and the man kept ordering. till they finally realize that their culture is that there must be at least half a table of food un touched before they consider that everyone is full. how wasteful of food! imagine the african kids do not have food to eat. and huixian will say but they wont be able to eat our waste food anyway-_- hahah! and 7 of us squeezed into the car. hahha! then daddy were telling us last time in malaysia how my uncle insisted on squeezing 10 ppl into the car. when all 10 finally got in they couldnt breath and all of them ran out of the car! hahaha:) when u are born in a large family, u must learn the art of squeezing into a car. hahaa!

then we're like trying to get gor out from camp for the wedding! hahaha! damn funny. coz at first my bro said he got rejected. then coz army ranks matter. so they said qianjun will call their waren and says that TAN JIAN WEN IS INVITED TO MMY WEDDING AND HE'S A VERY IMPT GUEST! haha. then we dun tell them their relationship and make them very scared of my bro. hahaha! or ask mummy's cousin's son. who is a damn high rank officer in army. hahha! but it's like we're not even close to him lah. or ask er jie to go and talk to the person. then da jie said. we will get you out no matter what as long as you dun give up on yourself. then i was like WOW! they sounded as if gor gor really going for a war. when it's like just getting him out of camp and a parent's letter will most prob do the job. hahaa!

this morning da jie and i were watching huan zhu ge ge! daddy said it's so lame coz they spent an hour showing how erkang underwent cold turkey. but da jie and i were enjoying ourselves.we kept laughing at how lame erkang was when he kept giving noble talks to ziwei about how much he loves her. and knowing how much she loves him. therefore she should give him the drugs. so corny. hahaa! da jie said all the drug addicts are like that. they like to bargain and bargain to get the drugs. then we were saying the best way to stop him from injuring himself is to wrap him up like a mummy including his head so he cant bite his own tongue. haha!

we were laughing out loud at one moment then the next we were all crying! damn lame! then daddy kept saying we shld watch more and learn the chim chim chi! but it's like all flowery flowery love lines who can we say them to lah! hahaha! :)

da jie is like practising real hard for her performance but like she still not very good and only 2 more weeks to her wedding! i'm like her messenger lah! yest mummy and daddy came home! then da jie was practising at 1st level. so she ran up and called me for help. so i had to run from 3rd level to the 1st and pretended i was downstairs all along. then after that er jie came home i had to run to da jie's room to ask her to stop playing. hahaha! then she packed up and came out of the room acting nonchalent. let's hope they wont find out and have a great surprise on the wedding day!

:) i really thank god coz i'm closer to my family recently. maybe it's coz of the sch hols. but i'm really happy i am! and i cant wait for jcts to be over and wedding to come! though i dunnno what i'm suppose to do as the emcee! hahaa! all the aunties coming over to our house for stayover the night before. then we'll have family dinner. then hopefully can have like talk with my sis before her wedding. i know she needs the rest though. then next morn really early have to start preparing le! ahhhh! i cant wait yet at the same time dun wish it to arrive so soon coz that means my sis will be moving out soon :( i'll miss her and all the insane stuff we do tgt. so much that my parents think we're crazy. hahaa! amazing how we can clique so well when we are of 9 yrs different in age:)

rained @ 2:40 PM

wed went assisi with carmen and chelle! heard carmen's exp at imh! it's so interesting:) i wanna visit it one day too! but i can totally imagine carmen's face when she's horrified by some of them. kids today still cute as ever of course! :) really love the hospice! more volunteers today! haha! one of them is justin and i rmb him coz he acts in sunday channel 8 kids show and i always watch! hahaha! but he grows so big alrdy! he's only 1 year younger. saw joel! and went to buy cake with carmen for her friend's bday!

rained @ 9:02 PM

courage is not the absence of fear. it is doing the right things despite your fear.

this is what god said to me that day. thanks michelle for listening to me that day on mrt! =) allow me to pour out all my shit feelings. thank god for you! though many times i feel very lost, i know it's in god's control and everything will turn out fine! at least i have my siblings! i love them soooo much!=) lord pls bless my family! pls bless me and allow me to live my life for u and not live the life others want me to live! and in ur strength i can do everything that's right and not fear!

ruiyang sent me this! so much guides memories=)
--> http://youtube.com/watch?v=zmQm7k0cECs

rained @ 10:13 PM

past 2 days have been such blessed days:)


yest! celebrated huipink's bday! met claire early in the morning 8am to prepare food for our picnic. then went to buy ping's present. on the mrt we were like reminising our old days! and it's so sweet so hilarious so much fun so much memories! came home for afternoon nap before we cook the remaning food and prepare for picnic!


first time to fort canning! aft claire brought me to my 1st trip to subway too! when we reached fort canning! it was raining! :( and we spent $7.50 on a taxi fee coz of surcharge when it's just 5 min walk from douby ghaut mrt. i know where national museum is! so can bring 1406 there! YEA, so we had picnic at the pavillion and talked! then after the rain stopped we walked around fort canning before going to bakerzin near CONRAD! :) i miss that place! and bakerzin has nice dessert! my first trip there too! hahaa! then after that we walked to esplanade butties fav place, talked and catch up! so comfy and i love u girls. on the way we saw this pretty waterfall place:)



















HOPE U LIKE UR BDAY CELEBRATION PING! :) happy sweet 18th bday! may all ur dreams and wishes come true! enjoy sun with ur family! our friendship will stay strong and true forever! LOVES<33 TODAY! council handover at sentosa! played games, had our own fun slacking around, talking and admiring seneries. doing things as a 30th and seeing our juniors enjoy themselves! it's like we're so much like a family. we're comfortable doing all things together! i'm really blessed to have u ppl in my life :)

then went back to sch and started all the treasure hunts for items to acquire council room. around 5 hours of search! did all the cupboards and mess up the room! hahhaa! funny lah! found the missing door knob. then played dihui's game! hahaha! they found the president key so fast! but we made them rehearse for morning assembly so quite cool lah! they have a chance to try out before sch reopens:) then when they enter the room after greeting bernard and gloria, we bombed them with water bombs! hahhaa! room damn WET! :) but yen tinge and ryan seems like really enthu ADs:) haha! so i think it'll be in a clean state soon!

wrote the lime green book too and had dinner with 30th. it's really a blessing. well, we have no more sc room! maybe i'll feel really wierd and sad when sch reopens and no room to go to. but for now it feels okie. and hope 31st will treasure the room and keep it clean too! :) I REALLY REALLY LOVE MY 30th. the friendship forged so deep i'm really really thankful to GOD! and i love my juniors i know council is safe in their hands :) TJSC rocks my socks! AAHHHH!! :):)

rained @ 10:55 PM

today did ming jin's locker! it's the cuttest locker! YES IT IS! :) hahaha! THANKS soedarSONO! :) nononono! HAHA! xinhui and I are so proud of our lockers! we just stand there and keep admiring and praising each other! hahaha! so sad ming jin wont be there to see it on handover day :( but hope u're having a GREAT and FULFILING time there my SHREK junior:) YEA HOHOOO! tml is huiPINK's bday! guess where we're going? HMMMM! :)

rained @ 10:06 PM

today the kids are much rowdier:) probably coz they're familiar with us already. when u're there u just feel like staying for the whole day. i really want to know what each of them are suffering from so i will be more sensitive. but it's so nice to see them so innocent and to see the smiles on their faces.

today kenneth kissed me:) and i found out he's a phillipines! so cute!
this girl called siti hugged me today and said " i love you!" i was so touched. mayumi also hugged me and said " i like you". i'm really feeling attached to these kids:)

there's children's conflict today! coz like they keep not wanting to friend each other. but i dun think they're mature enough to forgive siti coz she's sick.

and naomi suddenly became so sad for i dunno what reason but she's like so cute. if she's not a kid, u'll call her a bimbo coz she goes shopping and touring around the world then hide under the table coz she thinks it's raining:) haha.

miyumi likes to act like a baby and she really tries to whine like one. so u cant help but to treat her like one. ruhini is so smart:) she completes the jigsaw puzzle and her smile is so lovable u smile everytime u see her smile!

played reversi with petra and met 2 more volunteeres today. gabriel from rjc. she got enrolled into medicine alrdy. waiting for her term to start. also, natalie.

i knew more kids today! venus, val, 2 siti, nicholas, marcus, dinny, huihuan..

so much experience in 2 days. i think these kids really enrich my life alot:) hope that when i continue to volunteer after As, these kids that i meet will still be there. it's really a blessing that in our lifetime on earth, our lives crossed each other's path:) thank god!

studied together with jx and hx at bishan lib after that. it's quite a nice place! cant wait for next mon to come till i meet the kids again:)

talked to yulin talked to zach. well i dunno really dunnno what's going to happen what i'm suppose to do. maybe i'm procrastinating? maybe i should be more firm so god can do sth for me? but oddly it dun bother me much. wierd! god pls show me the way PLSSSSS! i'll do what u say!

rained @ 9:02 PM

today! 1st day volunteering at assisi hospice:) it's quite a good experience. most kids do not look like they are terminally ill. i taught wei jie english at first. he was like a shy boy. which later turns out to not be true. coz he's like a monkey. haha! keep running about. he shows attitude. refuse to do the physio or eat vegetables. but he's quite cute:) we keep throwing balls at each other. he's like super violent. hahaa!
there's also song kian who taught me how to fold things and very bubbly. keep talking to us. kenneth is the guy that i like! he's so handsome and cute. hahaha! then he keep hugging me refuse to let me go when i'm about to leave. (oops! not suppose to show favouritism)
then there's the little miss korea. she's a chinese but she looks TOTALLY like a korean. and miss sri lanka naomi. she's leaving for sri lanka soon coz her parents cant find a job here! but she recovered alrdy. though might have relapse within 5 yrs.
many many more interesting kids:) the indian girl who also refuses to eat veg and the caucasian girl who keep making mich read books with her. it's nice interacting with them. they dun have to worry about breaking any ice coz any kids are like their friends!
of course the older children too. but they are very obedient too and interact well with the young ones! and i think geraldine is so cool!
and there's the really really pretty play room! where there's the balls, big winnie the pooh and lotsa pillows! hahaha:)

Yea, going back 4 more times this month! i hope i'll be able to meet these kids:) many of them attends church. hahaha! but i think they might be too young to know about god. but thanks god for blessing these kids with so much happiness though they are faced with illnesses. i love u lord!

yest, a msg from yulin. touched. excited. scared. loved. i dunno what i was feeling. but it's such a mixed feeling. i just know god has a plan for me. and i'm going to wait for it to take place. whatever may come. come. but in ur strength not mine i will overcome it. thanks god for loving me so much. really really! sometimes i think i dun deserve it but u always show me that i really do. and i'm so so thankful my LORD!:)

rained @ 8:52 PM