sometimes life is really not about what u don't hav. but focusing on what u have and all ur blessings. it's time i pick myself up and be firm. no turning back yingxiu.

rained @ 12:34 AM

HM.. been working and the job's getting a lil boring. but the pay is good so oh well. maybe will only work there for 4 hours after Jan and find a more fulfiling job instead. hahaa. last time i thought job @ a hotel can be quite boring because of my attachment. but now i feel it's acty quite fun. at least i get to interact with ppl. i'm not really an office kindda girl lah! hahaha.

WAA. i just read may's entry! i feel like watching gong zhu xiao mei nowww! i miss chiong-ing ou xiang ju. though u feel so tired but like u just cant stopp! but then end le will feel super sad. sometimes u really wish ur life could be like the plot of the show. the last one that i chiong-ed was Gong. so it's been quite long le. Yea lohh. i think my job is too long hours le and it's not fulfiling. i think i'm lacking time to do the many other things that I want to do le.

now i think the only fulfiling thing in my life is Chingay. went for training today and had lunch with the new friends I made. They're such nice people and I know I'm just going to enjoy this experience sooooo much. went for lunch then had talks :) all of them are really funny! had a great time laughing with them today! met my group! US25 today! i have a nice GIC sherry and great team members. so i know we'll be able to work tgt really well. next week I'll meet my other group!

I really hope I can go to church with no worries. even though it may not be what they hope for but at least acceptance? I feel kindda suffocated everytime I'm informed of church events and the fears of the persecutions that will follow often drown me. I dun wanna lie but I'm always so tempted to do so. I know God's grace will see me through and everything will turn out great in the end. but I just hate the feeling of not being able to do the things that I want heartily now. and i really wanna attend church events without feeling like that at all. and sometimes the battle can be so tiring. it's like I'm all alone. Sometimes I really want to talk to a christian friend about all these, but i dunno who to call or talk to. I'll talk to God. and though I do find great comfort in God but when I stop praying and reciting over his promises. Fear would creep up to me unknowingly again. I dunnno when that all I say will ever be understood or accepted. I dunnno when a compromise will be made. A reasonable one. and i dunnno what kind of a compromise it will be. it's so tiring spiritually. I just hope that all this will strengthen me at the end of the day. and I just pray so hard right now for my faith to be unwavering. when the circumstance press u so hard. it's so tempting for us to give in and just give up. but i know I cant and I wont. SISTERS AND BROTHERS PRAY FOR ME PLSS. for me to press on.
Thanksgiving. I really hope to be there and spend the last day of 2007 with cell. i'm asked to share my testimony of how GOD has seen me thru this year. As I recall, though it may not be as significant as queenie's, but what HE has done for me has really been so amazing and special for me. and i'm excited to share. I hope ppl will be as excited to hear too. Ok. I was a lil emo just now. just a lil while ago. typed till I cry. but now I feel happy as I recall what happened this year and what God has done for me. wow, I really have the ability to mood change very quickly. really Thanks God for that man coz it has been so useful for me esp during this period. or else I will be so bothered for the whole day by a phone call or a statement made . but at least now, even after a phonecall or statement, I can leave the burden aside first, concentrate on what I'm doing happily 1st and then pick up the burden again later. it kindda become the lifestyle I'm leading everyday alrdy.

Anyway, HAPPY 2007! I'm excited for 2008! i know it'll definitely be a greater and more blessed year than 2007 :)

rained @ 10:25 PM

Christmas :) Yea, though dint get to go church. but christmas eve was still good. followed er jie to mel's house. ate the super nice food. played charades, in between. i lost $12. hahha! but some lost more. the pool grew so big till around $80. quite scary lah. hahhaa! Yea, then also the "woosh, yes mam, yes sir, smack" gamE! hahha. it was fun lah :) good getaway from all the things that happened. but felt i could have handled it better. Yea, but what's done cant be undone. just have to take note next time!

rained @ 1:48 AM

whole of last week was trainingg and also started work! Yea :) it's quite ok lah the job. i like talking to ppl so Yea, it's quite good and the pay's good too!
met jappies for dinner:) surprise joel for his bday. cell at orchard taking crazy pics! :)

and today! went for wayne's and derrick's bday bashh! fun as usual with my family e4o6! the sabo was Bad! but we still LOVE each other MANY MANY!! Food was GREAT and the christmas tree was Pretty!! then met council for Minds! hahaha! played favourite family business and i love tech teaming with stephhy. HAHAHA! :) i love 30th so muchhh!

Yea, and this morning received a good christmas gift! i just pray that it'll come to pass! and salvation will come upon my family really soon! just talked to carmen! and i love my miss tickle tickle. HAHA! i believe we'll still be so close after many yrs coz our friendship is built upon God's kingdom. so glad that our lives cross each other. And we might not be in the same church but Yea, we will still sit at church congregation at our old age and tickle each other :)

CHRISTMAS EVE is like TODAY! oh my!!!! 18 more hoursss till service. i cant waitt.. and CHIRSTMAS! Jesus u are the reason i liveee :):) if u do not know Jesus, u're missing out the most important thing of your life!! let HIM come and revolutionalise your lifeee! :)

Merry Christmassss To YOUUU! Jesus LOVES you a Great Deal!!!

rained @ 1:13 AM

Camp BREAKAWAY. my 1st church camp and it's the best man! Draconia! Drion :) HUAT AH!! many many fun! cheer until i no more voice now! so much Rahh Rahh-ness. the mascot making, station games, workshop, night game at 1am on 1st day, sentosa games, red dot game at expo was really great. But nth can beats the LOVE throughout the whole camp. The bonds and friends made. The SERVICES which was so impactful every single time. touched by GOD so much during this camp. Saw HIS power at work! it's Phenomenol. so much friends added into the kingdom. His love mercy and grace accompanies me all days of my life. Made me cry so much every single service because HIS love for me is so Great. though i'm tired physically pressed by trials at home, but i am so charged spiritually.

LORD, i know u have a greAT plan for me. continue to work in my life. Bless me as i go through This Transition from Tradition which would Definitely Transform my life and that of my friends and family. I will not grumble but work hard as your labourer to see your plans come to pass. AMEN.

rained @ 7:23 PM

Today went to Powee's POP woth yulin,shiming,jielun,powee's dad and bro-in-law. hahha! quite cool lah. my 1st time to tekong and POP since i missed my bro's one. YEA. hahaha! Talking to Jielun can be one of the most exasperating thing to do. coz everytime u think he's going to tell u sth serious, he starts talking crappy stuff. HAHA. but yes quite a good entertainer! esp his Handphone pics HOHO! dun need to be shy man!! we're a family! :) Shiminggg! so glad ur bro is going! Yea, we had our fair share of fun thinking of cheerss!

then shiming and i had soup spoon at bugis. derrick joined us. called the daniel guy for our job. HAHA! all the yulin's affiliation are working under the same good lobang lah! :) Yea, the soup spoon is super filling. suggest ppl to share if they wanna eat that next time. Then 3 of us are erm super unproductive there. no hair spray. no presents. no nat. HAHA!

so after that we met the rest. went dhoby ghout for our General Meeting! OOH HOO! discuss games cheers identities! i'm getting super excited for CAMP BREAKAWAY lahhhhhhhh!!!!!!! MOST HAPPENING camp of the Year!!!!!!!!!! AHHHH!! only 1 more day i cantttttt WAIT! HAHAHA =) surely alot of Fun, Excitement, Surprise, LOVEEE!!! Everythingg is going to be so cool and definitely LOTS and LOTS of GOD! what mingwei said is making me super duper excited! 'It's phenomenol! Lots of miracles. Go with expectancy!'

Hey anyone interested can contact meeee! :) will be held at St Andrew's Village. 13--15. if u cant stayover, Just come for Day's event or Night's event. But of course it's good to stayover. since there will be lotsa surprise element. i really dunnno what will be going on! but definitely worth looking forward to!!! Yea! 2nd day will be at sentosaaa! OOHH HOO! interested parties! contact TAN YING XIU @ 97581753 :) See you there!

---- > http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aVutMc-Bu6Y&eurl=http://jian-hao.blogspot.com/
-----> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJPW39wcPnc&NR=1

rained @ 11:23 PM

YEA :) yest was quite a drama mama day! but i'm glad i chose GOD and i'm glad HE never forsakes me. angels never fail to be around me. And i believe when I make a stand for HIM, He'll restore all things for me and make it better than it has always been. it will seem impossible in human context but with GOD all things are possible! Definitely! i don't know where I found the courage to do all the episodes yest! but the holy spirit was guiding me all along. haven told yulin yet. but her 2 messages prompted me to do what was to be done when I was struggling! So GOD is really really amazing.

And i really love GOD for giving me this personality to just feel good about bad things that happen to me very quickly and just be my happy self again. I'm really glad that it doesnt affect service and not at all today! I wanna build a rock of faith that nth can ever tear down. I know LORD you are testing me and it is sth that I definitely can BEAR! if everything that is to happen is planned out, what can be wrong with GOD around in my life!

Thank you LORD, for i know thru this all u're doing sth in my household. Thanks for queenie and her prayer. yulin and her concern. bro and his advice. jessalyn, shiming, junsen for their encouragement. and wayne for his email. truly GOD with YOU around. there's nth i fear! now i pray for Camp BREAKAWAY and Christmas service! i praise you and i honor you in all things that i do. and i pray all these in JESUS precious name, AMEN!!

rained @ 12:16 AM

Today i met miss Clairity Neo :)
went sch in the morn to drop stamps. it's $5 per envelope. 1st time i send such expensive mails.
then went to hungry claire's house. she just burnt her hands by the steam from the rice cooker. poor thing. and she made brownies for me which i dint get to savor in the end. But lunch was GOOD! hahaha 2 girls ate quite alot. obviously i am well and fine from my vomitting and diarrhoea last night

Yea, so i saw her many many prom pics and got to know her sch ppl :) wow! i really like their idea of a prom booklet. so did catching up with this girl as we went bugis for ice cream and for shopping.Yea, sorry i couldnt stop yawning. Hahaa. love u GIRL! butts outing on mon! this time a proper one with miss tay! :)

then went cell after that. led by pauline. met samuel who is kenneth's ex room mate. how small this world is man! coool! :) YEA! tml service with doc avazini! and i'm sure that i'll be able to go for all the events and my pledge for christmas is going to come true! Thank you Lord~! :)

rained @ 12:05 AM

Prom is over. and it marks an end to my 2 yrs in TJC. i must say this journey has been a really fulfiling one. i really thank god for the privilege to enjoy my JC life soooo much! council, 1406, church and all the wonderful memories shared :) i've really gotta say i've grown alot as a person this 2 yrs!

rained @ 10:05 PM

today met miss tickle tickle :) and i so miss this girl! went tampines. tried to sign up for some course but some super ex. then went bugis. we talked alot along the way.. so glad we caught up with each other's life godmother of my child:) shopped and she bought some stuff. i was being totally lazy just wanting to sit down. HAHA.
Saw miss claire neo and miss teo and their 2 gd frens too! again! :)
icon became some ktv pub! such a huge one somemore! wow! bugis surely changed alot! dint notice it the last time i went with BFF. haha.
and i saw the video carmen took with her 17 yrs old cousin! and it's TOTALLY hilarious lah! HAHAHA! gosh like 2 retards but they were like really really CUTE! :):) hahaha then carmen and i took lotsa silly pics! but we enjoyed ourselves dint we. i think passer bys think we're crazy. HAHA. upload the pics girl!

Yea! :) so glad u accepted the invitation! everything is going to be great and alright with God around! and i'll ALWAYS be here for u girl! :) LOVE YOU!

prom in 18 hours time. and claire lim the treat from u all surely made me feel so loved. made me cry ok! :) love u girls! but hey i'll treat u all next time okkkk! oh no! i'm suppose to clear my camera memories! i forgot! bye bye :)

I LOVE YOU GOD! everything is like kindda back to normal again! PRAISES AND GLORY to you! indeed i was never alone. so much love comfort blessings and angels sent to me. how can i ever do w/out you! <33333333333333!!!

rained @ 12:46 AM

HI world! had 1406 chalet from 28--30th nov then had sats, church and persecution yest :) yup!
Chiong Berkeley application and had Bible Studies before chalet. WOW! GOd is indeed good lah! He postponed my MOE intership submission date so I could focus on my Berkeley application. so glad it's over now! 3 more to go! and i just finished my MOE one:)

Chalet was great great great esp when I spend with my bunch of fun-loving classmates. though we were like so unhealthy staying indoor all the time.
we played street soccer, saboteur, swap, bridge, went airport to fetch ernest (t3 &hx sprained her leg), played monkey, BBQ...
Yea, so glad god place me in 1406 :) with friends whom I am so comfortable and happy with. my JC life is indeed rich and colourful because of them and my council mates! Love TJC so much!

Yea, SATS yest at the starhub centre, I was like so tired after the paper. hope it went well. Yea, had lunch with ah boon. then went church. queued up and had pm. the sermon was great lah! :)

God's presence was so strong. I just love my Heavenly Father. like HE prepared my heart for the things that were about to come. and gave me words that encourage me. took away my fears. made me more than a conqueror. christian life is indeed not a bed of rose. many trials and persecution. but with God, everything is going to be alright. and with God in my life, I have no limitations to the things I can do!
I can become successful by my own strength. but I am still limited by the books I read and the things I come across. but with God.... I see the different and better side of everything and I can even do things that seem impossible!! mountain moving faith! to have faith is to have confidence in the LORD. and I trust in you my LORD. i really trust in you and stand on your words and promises. THe best has yet to come! I'm not going to forsake my father because of my fears. HE died on the cross for me! next 30 days are going to be great. it's not how I started but how I end.

wow! just when I thought last year's salvation and everything was good enough. it's not the end loh. every year just gets better and better! grew stronger, more spiritual and mature in christ. found a home and a family! :) more trials and stronger persecution.

Thanks FATHER! I stand on your promise that when one in the household is saved, all will be saved. I know where I come from and I know where I am going but they do not know where they come from and they do not know where they are going. You never taught me to fear. I was not created to fear so I have no fears in me. You who are in me is greater than You who are in this world. You will make me the head and not the tail, above and not beneath! :) I love you LORD. I am indeed MORE THAN A CONQUEROR! <333333 WOO HOOO! i love my lifeeee! :)

rained @ 7:28 PM