some time to steal during attachment to blog..
it's evident tt God is with me here in this attachment.
almost all the time after a teacher's name is mentioned i would meet the exact same person on my way back to office, and all these are so helpful to me as an attachee here in ECPS alone..
and so many teachers and so nice tt ms ng ee ling sitting behind me, 1st teacher i talked to also happens to be a new teacher so i get company when i go for AM and OM induction..
and books tt are useful to me for my project.. reading this "The First Days of School" book tt teaches me how to be a more effective teacher..
this project encompasses so much. feel like JS project which almost killed my grp. have to conceptualize the project myself, decide who to interview, read thru all the datas and find out reasons why the school is not performing in maths--- teaching method, socioeconomic background, race? , up to me to find out and decide. come up with proposal on what can be done and apply it during hands on teaching..
everything is so practical, like having to apply what i learn and read.. it's all kindda new to me and quite challenging for me too, but i m embracing it and changing my attitude.. using this project as an opportunity for me to really learn abt how it is like teaching in a school.. and abt real challenges being faced by students.. instead of viewing it as a chore.
and with my mentor not being with me almost all the time, it's really up to me to come up with my own activities, to learn and experience things.. up to me how much i want to get out of this attachment..
it's only day 2. waking up 6am everyday is not easy for me. esp being known for always being late.. cant do tt anymore now tt i m a teacher coz i m an example and it's a really bad habit i hope to change, even if it means having to wait for my frens sometimes.. and esp tough this week having to shuttle after school for psych camp, BS and tuition. sleeping ard 4-5 hours a day.
much responsibilities but hope i m not neglecting my family. gong gong is in hospital and i yet have a chance to go down and see him.. so much frens to meet, so much things to do. and hall stuff, feel so old and dun feel like being so involved anymore coz feel i've spent so much time and effort giving to hall, now i just want to rest and give more time to other impt things in my life. studies, frens, family, God...
and of course more time for you too! i miss u there in ICT. unknowingly, i think u have become someone so impt to me. the past did much damage to me. makes me feel so disintegrated sometimes, not knowing myself and things tt matter. being numb, skeptical and avoidant abt many things. like many parts of my life went missing, but u piece up these broken pieces for me, by being ever so loving, committed and understanding. by giving me ur best. by pushing all my buttons and make me face the fears which are within me. of course, these are not done wout much quarrels and disagreements. i feel i never quarrel w with anyone so much my whole life. but still, u taught me so much. working things out, sometimes just rather be alone, but still staying coz i rmb the promises being made and the tot of any of us going thru a heartache again, i dun want tt to happen to you or to me. it really takes effort to stay committed and to love somebody. and i'll learn to control all these emotional fluctuations of mine and i'll treasure you. u r really God's gift for me. and last thing i want is for you to be taken away coz i take u for granted.
and to all my dear besties going thru difficult times. it's all to make us stronger and we'll survive hard times somehow. just keep going! i'll be here and i love you <3
Thank you Jesus for many things in life, u keep me kicking n alive, coz i'll always have the assurance tt whether it's good or bad, tt all things come from you! and i love you my Lord!
